If you're just starting out in homeschooling, you may be feeling a little overwhelmed. This is my attempt to set your mind at ease.
I've noticed a common theme among questions asked by those new to homeschooling. For lack of a better title, I'll call them "should I" questions. Should I use this curriculum? Should I do notebooking or stick with workbooks? Do you think my seven year old should be reading by now? What should I do when my kid won't sit still?
I find it puzzling that someone would ask me what is best for their child. Now, I'm not saying it's wrong to ask for advice. Advice can be very useful. However, I think a lot of these questions come from mothers who are feeling a bit unsure of their ability to carry out this undertaking now that they have committed themselves to it.
So, since you asked, here is my advice: No one knows your kids better than you do.
The Best Educational Philosophy Is Your Own
Maybe it's mother's intuition, maybe its just because you are living in close proximity, but you know those kids much better than I do. I can tell you what works with my kids, but I'm pretty sure your kids aren't any more like my kids than they are like the thirty or so kids that would be in the same class with them if they were to go to a public school. Isn't that part of the reason you are homeschooling them -so you could teach them in a way that was best for them?
There is a lot of wisdom to be gleaned from the writings of vetran homeschoolers such as Charlotte Mason and Ruth Beechick, and from systems like the Principal Approach or Classical Education. But if your effort to mimic these philosophies and ideas is interfering with your ability to teach your child, you are defeating your purpose.
Relax, you can do this! If you think about it, homeschooling really isn't much different than the rest of life. All those birds, flowers, trees, and animals you pointed out to them were an introduction to science. And they were learning math every time you said, "You may have two pieces of cheese, but only one cookie." If you taught your child to talk, teaching them to read is just the next step. And since you've been reading to them since they were little, you must know what books they would enjoy. So, pick out a few that will double as a history lesson. Every parent is a home educator. Some of us just do it more often.
Curriculum Is A Tool
Just as there are many great homeschool philsophies to choose from, there are also many wonderful curriculums. However, even the "best" curriculum is no good if it doesn't work for you. Remember, curriculum is just a tool, and like any other tool, it should make your life easier.
There is nothing wrong with using only part of a program or mixing two programs together. There is also nothing wrong with getting rid of a program entirely and trying something new. If money is an issue, find someplace to sell it second hand. It isn't worth your time or sanity to struggle along with a curriculum that doesn't fit. You and your childen will both end up dreading your learning time.
When choosing your curriculum, don't confine yourself to the whole "grade level" thing. Children are often ready to learn things before -or even after- the recommended grade. As I said before, no one knows your child better than you do, so teach them what you know they are ready to learn, not what everyone else says you should.
Placing children in different grade levels is an artificial system set up for organizational purposes in the institutional schools. However, in homeschooling it often makes more sense to teach a subject to all the children at the same time. There are many excellent science, history, and geography programs which are intended to be taught to multi-age levels. If you are teaching several children at the same time, this method is a great time saver.
There's More to Education Than Bookwork
It is easy for a homeschool mother to get overwhelmed by all the responsibilities of educating the children and keeping up the home, even if she only has one or two children. However, when the household contains a large number of children, it becomes absolutely necessary that every member do their part to keep things running smoothly. All the children, from youngest to oldest, should be required to help with the daily cleaning and maintenance of the home as soon as they are able.
This, however, should not be seen as a hardship. It is not a "downside" to homeschooling or having a large family, but rather a benefit. It is not something which we should view as secondary to our childrens' education, or as getting in the way of their education, but rather as an important part of their education.
Book learning is important and should not be neglected. However, our children will also require a variety of skills throughout life, and doing chores is the perfect way to learn those skills. This type of learning should be a part of all childrens' education and you should never feel guilty for requiring it of yours.
Some of the Best Resources Are Found In Unexpected Places
I always encourage my children to take advantage of their opportunities, because we never know if that opportunity will present itself again. It is much easier for a single young man or woman to aquire skills and knowledge that will help them later in life than it is for a married man or woman with family commiments and financial obligations to pick up those same skills when they become necessary. It is often much cheaper too.
As homeschool parents, we should always be aware of the learning opportunities that arise around us. If your hot water heater goes out, have the children watch as it is replaced (from a safe and out of the way location). If the local farmer asks your boys to spend an afternoon helping him put up hay, let them. Look for opportunities for your child to volunteer. Look for friends and relatives with special skills who are willing to pass them on to your children, then create the time and opportunity for that to happen. Take advantage of local events: ethnic festivals, library programs, VBS, concerts, plays. Visit parks or craftsmen in your area and encourage the children to ask questions.
This approach to education often calls for a sacrifice from us as parents. We must be willing to work out the details to make these experiences possible. Sometimes we must sacrifice our time to drive them to and from an event and sometimes we must sacrifice their time and the plans that we have already made for them. But these small "opportunity costs" are greatly outweighed by the benefits gained. And these opportunities don't always come more than once.
At the same time, make sure you keep a balance. Remember, you can't do it all. But do try to do what you can.
But Don't Forget To Be A Mom!
As a second generation homeschooler, I sometimes cringe when I hear other homeschool moms talk about their "educational opportunities." I hear comments like, "We took a walk today. Mark it down for phys ed!" or "We're taking a cross country trip to visit relatives. How can I make it educational?"
While I loved being homeschooled, and I think my mom did a great job overall, I occasionally felt as if I was stuck in a perpetual classroom. Somewhere along the way I had lost my mother, and she had been replaced by SUPER TEACHER! In her enthusiasm to give me the best possible education, she sometimes forgot that it's also important to have a "life outside of school."
It's true that all of life is educational, but that's true even for those who DON'T homeschool. It's OK for your children to experience some things as nothing more than a normal part of family life. (That doesn't mean they won't learn from them.) Some things should be less about making grades and more about making memories. This is especially important in a large family where "mom time" is somewhat limited.
And One Last Thing . . .
Don't forget that learning isn't just for kids. Mothers too often use their busy schedules to excuse themselves from any mental exercise. But just as muscles atrophy without use, so a mind that is not exercised soon turns to mush. Continuing to learn new things will not only benefit your family by making you better equipped to fulfil your duties, but it will also send a message to your children that learning is not just something one is forced to do until they are old enough to do more important things. As your child sees your enthusiasm for learning, they will become excited about learning too.
Here are three ways you can use "mother culture" to nuture your child's love of learning:
1. Set educational goals for yourself.
Think of something you want to learn and then make time to learn it. Your goals could include learning new skills or increasing your head knowledge. Here are a few ideas to get you started:
* Learn a foreign language.
* Build a web page using trial and error.
* Do a research project on that topic from the kids lessons that you wanted to know more about.
* Make a lapbook (use a kit or design your own)
* Learn how to sew, knit, or do another handcraft.
* Take a photography class.
2. Read something besides fluffy fiction or the kids school books.
Read books on homemaking, homeschooling, motherhood, or marriage. Consider these your "textbooks” which can be read and reread for insight and encouragement. Or, read something that will help you to reach the educational goals you have set for yourself. But also read great literature- books which will stretch you and fill your mind with beautiful pictures and ideas to ponder.
3. Nuture your own curiosity.
No trivia is trivial when it provides the opportunity for a great educational experience. Children will naturally ask questions, but they will not always know how to get the answers unless you show them. A great way to do this, is by keeping track of those times when you say "I wonder . . ." and making the effort to actually find the answer.
Remember, learning is a lifetime experience. Enjoy the adventure!
